What Can You Not Do During a Divorce


by Chris Torrone



Can’t you just do whatever you want during a divorce? It’s your life, your decisions, right? Well, not exactly. When it comes to navigating the complexities of divorce, there are certain actions you should avoid at all costs. In this article, we’ll explore what can you not do during a divorce. From getting pregnant to settling early, we’ll guide you on the right path, helping you protect yourself and those you care about most. So, let’s dive in and discover the actions that can make or break your divorce journey.

what not to do during a divorce Torrone Law What Can You Not Do During a Divorce

Key Takeaways

  • Seek guidance and support from a family law attorney to navigate the divorce process effectively and ensure a fair resolution.
  • Prioritize the well-being and protection of children involved in custody battles during a divorce.
  • Avoid actions that may jeopardize the family’s chances of restoring and maintaining their relationships.
  • Choose a reputable and experienced law firm like Torrone Law to receive the necessary resources, attention, and personalized treatment throughout the divorce proceedings.

Don’t Get Pregnant

During a divorce, it’s important to remember not to get pregnant, as it can complicate the legal process. Custody battles, division of assets, and debt settlement are already challenging enough without the added complexity of a pregnancy. Divorce lawyers often advise against getting pregnant during this time, as it can have serious consequences for both parties involved.

When it comes to custody, a pregnancy can raise questions about the stability and capability of the parent. It may affect the court’s decision on who gets custody of the children. Additionally, the division of assets and debts can become more complicated if there is a child on the way. The court will need to consider the financial impact of the pregnancy on both parties, which can further prolong the legal process.

Seeking legal advice before making any decisions is crucial. A divorce lawyer can provide guidance on how to navigate the situation and protect your rights. They can help you understand the potential consequences and provide strategies for managing the situation effectively.

Don’t Forget to Change Your Will

Make sure to remember changing your will is an important step in the divorce process. While you may be focused on the immediate aspects of your separation, it’s crucial to think about your future and how your property and assets will be distributed. Here are a few reasons why updating your will is essential:

  • Protect your assets: A divorce can significantly impact your property and marital assets. By updating your will, you can ensure that your assets are distributed according to your wishes and not subject to the default laws of your state.
  • Provide for your children: If you have children, revising your will is crucial to designate guardianship and provide for their financial well-being. This includes considerations for child custody and support.
  • Avoid conflicts: By clearly outlining your wishes in your will, you can minimize the potential for disputes and conflicts among family members during an already emotionally challenging time.
  • Coordinate with your estate planning: Updating your will during the divorce process allows you to align your estate planning with your new circumstances and ensure that your wishes are reflected accurately.

Don’t Dismiss the Possibility of Collaborative Divorce or Mediation

Don’t dismiss the option of collaborative divorce or mediation; they can help you navigate the process with less conflict and stress. When going through a divorce, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed and emotional. But instead of allowing these emotions to consume you, consider the alternative of collaborative divorce or mediation. Collaborative divorce involves working together with your spouse and a team of professionals to reach a fair and mutually beneficial resolution. This approach emphasizes open communication, cooperation, and finding solutions that work for both parties. Mediation, on the other hand, involves a neutral third party who helps facilitate discussions between you and your spouse to help you reach agreements on important matters, such as child custody and property division.

By choosing collaborative divorce or mediation, you can save time, money, and minimize the conflict that often arises in traditional divorce proceedings. These methods prioritize preserving the relationship with your spouse and focusing on the well-being of your family. So, don’t underestimate the power of collaboration and mediation in easing the divorce process for both you and your spouse. It’s an opportunity to approach the divorce with respect and compassion, laying the groundwork for a healthier post-divorce relationship. However, it’s important to remember that collaboration and mediation may not be suitable for every situation. In the next section, we’ll discuss another important consideration: not sleeping with your lawyer.

Don’t Sleep With Your Lawyer

It’s crucial to maintain professional boundaries and avoid getting romantically involved with your lawyer. While going through a divorce, emotions can run high, and seeking comfort or solace in your attorney may seem tempting. However, it’s important to remember that your lawyer is there to guide you through the legal process, not to become your romantic partner. Here are a few reasons why you should avoid crossing that line:

  • Maintaining objectivity: Getting romantically involved with your lawyer can cloud their judgment and compromise their ability to provide objective advice and representation.
  • Protecting your personal property: A personal relationship with your lawyer can make it difficult to separate personal and legal matters, potentially jeopardizing the protection of your personal and community property during the divorce proceedings.
  • Avoiding conflicts of interest: A romantic relationship with your lawyer can create conflicts of interest that may hinder their ability to negotiate a fair divorce settlement on your behalf.
  • Preserving professionalism: Engaging in a romantic relationship with your lawyer can damage their professional reputation and credibility, making it harder for them to effectively advocate for you.

Don’t Take It Out on the Kids

Remember to prioritize the well-being and emotional stability of your children throughout the divorce process. Your children are the most important consideration during this difficult time. It is essential to shield them from any conflicts or negative emotions that may arise. Domestic violence, custody battles, property division, and financial assets are all important aspects of a divorce, but none should take precedence over the well-being of your children.

Custody matters should be approached with the mindset of creating a stable environment for your children. It is crucial to make informed decisions that prioritize their needs and best interests. Remember, your children are not pawns in a game. They are innocent beings who deserve love, support, and stability.

Don’t Refuse to See a Therapist

Seeking therapy can provide valuable guidance and support for navigating the emotional challenges of divorce. It’s important to prioritize your mental health during this difficult time. Here are a few reasons why seeing a therapist can be beneficial:

  • Mental Health: Divorce can take a toll on your emotional well-being. A therapist can help you process your feelings and develop coping strategies to navigate the ups and downs.
  • Divorce Issues: From custody battles to property division, divorce involves complex legal proceedings. A therapist can help you understand and manage the stress that comes with these issues.
  • Amicable Agreement: If you and your spouse are aiming for an amicable agreement, a therapist can provide expert advice on communication and negotiation skills, helping you work towards a healthy resolution.
  • Abusive Husband: If you’re leaving an abusive relationship, therapy can be a crucial support system. A therapist can help you heal from the trauma and develop strategies to rebuild your life in a safe and healthy environment.

Don’t Wait Until After the Holidays

Don’t wait until after the holidays to prioritize your mental health and seek the support you need; taking care of yourself now will set the foundation for a brighter future. During this time of year, it’s easy to become overwhelmed with all the decisions, expenses, and plans that come with the holiday season. But amidst the chaos, it’s crucial to remember to prioritize your mental well-being.

The holidays can be a stressful and emotionally charged event, especially if you’re going through a divorce. It’s important to recognize the impact this can have on your mental health and to reach out for support. Whether it’s talking to a therapist, joining a support group, or confiding in a trusted friend, seeking help can provide the guidance and comfort you need during this challenging time.

In addition to seeking support, it’s also essential to take care of practical matters. Make sure to keep track of all your expenses, decisions, and accounts related to the divorce. Maintaining accurate records will not only help you stay organized but also ensure that you have a clear picture of your financial situation.

As you navigate through the holiday season, don’t forget about taxes. Transitioning into the next section, it’s important to be aware of the tax implications that can arise during a divorce.

Don’t Forget About Taxes

Amidst the chaos of the holiday season, it’s crucial to be mindful of the tax implications that can arise in a divorce. When going through this difficult process, it’s important to keep in mind the following:

  • Tax Returns: Be aware of how your tax filing status will change after the divorce. Seek guidance from a tax professional to ensure you understand your new tax responsibilities.
  • Credit Cards and Additional Debts: Take inventory of all joint credit cards and debts. It’s essential to address these financial obligations and determine who will be responsible for them moving forward.
  • Pension Plans: Dividing pension plans can have tax consequences. Consult with an attorney or financial advisor to understand the potential tax implications and ensure a fair division.
  • Division of Property and Joint Bank Accounts: The division of property can have tax implications, especially if there are significant assets involved. Additionally, joint bank accounts should be addressed to avoid any future financial conflicts.

Don’t Settle Early

Be aware that settling early in your divorce can have significant financial consequences that may impact your future stability and well-being. It is important to seek advice and fully understand the implications before making any decisions. Divorce is a complex process, and rushing to settle without considering all the factors can lead to costly mistakes.

One common mistake is opting for an uncontested divorce without fully understanding the concept of equitable distribution. In an uncontested divorce, both parties agree on the terms of the divorce without going to court. However, this does not necessarily mean a fair division of assets and debts. It is crucial to ensure that the distribution is truly equitable and in line with your rights and interests.

Another mistake to avoid is failing to properly complete your divorce petition. The divorce petition lays out the grounds for divorce and the relief you are seeking. Inaccuracies or omissions in this document can lead to delays and complications in the process.

By settling early without considering these factors, you risk making mistakes that could have long-term financial consequences. It is important to approach your divorce with caution, seeking advice and understanding the implications of every decision. Don’t settle for less than what you deserve.

And remember, settling early isn’t the only thing to avoid during a divorce. It’s also important not to increase your debt during this time.

Don’t Increase Your Debt

It’s crucial to be mindful of your finances and avoid accumulating more debt while going through a divorce. This is already a challenging time, and the last thing you need is to add financial stress to the mix. Here are some important things to keep in mind:

  • Seek guidance from a divorce coach or financial advisor who can help you navigate the complexities of dividing assets and debts.
  • Take inventory of your real property and make sure you have a clear understanding of how it will be divided.
  • Be cautious with your bank accounts and credit card debt. It’s important to monitor your spending and avoid making unnecessary purchases.
  • Prioritize your living expenses and create a budget that reflects your new financial situation.

Remember, this is a difficult time, and it’s important to take care of yourself both emotionally and financially. By being mindful of your finances and avoiding unnecessary debt, you can help ensure a smoother transition into the next chapter of your life.

When it comes to your kids, it’s important to remember not to use them as pawns in the divorce process.

Don’t Use Your Kids

While navigating a divorce, it’s crucial to refrain from using your children as pawns in the process. Remember that your children are innocent bystanders in this difficult situation. It is important to prioritize their well-being and protect them from any unnecessary emotional turmoil. Seek guidance from experienced family law attorneys who can help you navigate this challenging time with integrity and compassion.

Avoid involving your children in disputes with your estranged spouse. Shield them from any negative interactions or conflicts that may arise. Keep in mind that they are not responsible for the breakdown of your marriage and should not be burdened with adult issues.

Additionally, avoid discussing financial matters or legal disputes in front of your children. This includes discussions about joint accounts, retirement accounts, or property division. Shield them from any nasty text messages or arguments that may arise between you and your estranged spouse.

Instead, focus on creating a comprehensive parenting plan that prioritizes the best interests of your minor children. This includes establishing a consistent visitation schedule, determining decision-making responsibilities, and providing for their emotional and financial needs. By doing so, you can create a stable and nurturing environment for your children during this challenging time.

Don’t Transfer Property Without a Court Order

To avoid complications in the divorce process, make sure to obtain a court order before transferring any property. This step is crucial in protecting your rights and ensuring a fair distribution of assets. Here are some reasons why you should not transfer property without a court order:

  • Legal Consequences: Transferring property without a court order can have serious legal consequences. It can be seen as an attempt to hide assets or manipulate the distribution of assets, which can lead to jail time or hefty fines.
  • Complexity of Family Courts: Family courts can be complex and navigating them without proper guidance can be a tough time. It is important to follow the proper legal procedures to avoid any complications in your divorce case.
  • Protection of Your Rights: By obtaining a court order, you are protecting your rights and ensuring that the distribution of assets is fair and equitable. This will help you secure your financial future post-divorce.
  • Documentation and Record-Keeping: Obtaining a court order ensures that all property transfers are properly documented and recorded in real estate records. This documentation is essential for future reference and potential disputes.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can I Get Pregnant During a Divorce?

During a divorce, it’s important to focus on the question at hand: can you get pregnant? While divorce can be a challenging time, it’s still possible to become pregnant. However, it’s crucial to consider the emotional and practical implications of bringing a child into the situation. It’s recommended to consult with a healthcare professional and discuss your options and any potential risks before making any decisions. Remember to prioritize your well-being and make choices that are best for you.

Is It Necessary to Change My Will During a Divorce?

Is it necessary to change your will during a divorce? When going through a divorce, it’s crucial to review your will and make any necessary changes. Divorce can have significant implications on your estate plan and beneficiaries. By updating your will, you can ensure that your assets are distributed according to your wishes and protect your loved ones. Don’t overlook this important step in the divorce process. Seek guidance from a trusted attorney to help you navigate this aspect of your divorce.

What Is Collaborative Divorce or Mediation, and Why Should I Consider It?

Collaborative divorce or mediation is a way to peacefully resolve your divorce without going to court. It involves working together with your spouse and a neutral third party to reach a fair agreement. You should consider it because it can save you time, money, and emotional stress. It allows you to have more control over the outcome and promotes better communication and cooperation. It’s a respectful and efficient way to end your marriage and prioritize the well-being of everyone involved.

Is It Appropriate to Have a Romantic Relationship With My Lawyer During a Divorce?

Having a romantic relationship with your lawyer during a divorce is not appropriate. While it may seem tempting to seek comfort and support, it can create conflicts of interest and compromise the objectivity of your legal representation. It’s crucial to maintain a professional and ethical relationship with your lawyer to ensure the best outcome for your case. Your lawyer is there to guide and advocate for you, so it’s important to prioritize the legal process and focus on achieving a fair resolution.

How Can I Ensure That My Children Are Not Negatively Affected by the Divorce?

To ensure your children aren’t negatively affected by the divorce, prioritize their well-being and communication. Create a stable environment for them, maintaining routines and open lines of dialogue. Encourage their emotions and provide support during this difficult time. Avoid involving them in conflicts or badmouthing the other parent. Seek professional help if necessary. Remember, your children’s happiness and security should be the main focus as you navigate through the divorce process.


In conclusion, remember that a divorce is a delicate and complex process that requires careful consideration of your actions. You must avoid certain actions to protect yourself, your children, and your future. By not getting pregnant, changing your will, dismissing collaborative divorce or mediation, sleeping with your lawyer, taking it out on the kids, settling early, increasing your debt, using your kids, and transferring property without a court order, you can navigate the divorce process more effectively. So, be mindful of your choices and seek professional guidance to ensure a smoother and more favorable outcome.

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